Labour saving?

The advances in modern technology are designed to make our lives easier.

We have cars a planes to make travel faster. We have hot water on tap, electricity at the flick of a switch. We have vaccuum cleaners, washing machines and tumble dryers No more "Monday is washday". Although, now and again, I have to confess that the thought of washing clothes by bashing them on rocks or up and down a washboard has a certain appeal when it comes to relieving stress.

We also have dishwashers.

Before we moved to the cottage, I didn't have a dishwasher. Or, to be more precise, I didn't have a pile in the dishes and press a button dishwasher.

What I did have was Himself.

We had a division of labour. I cooked. He washed and dried up.

We seem to have lost that somewhere along the way. Himself has a problem with loading a dishwasher. Nothing gets put in with any logic and I end up having to restack it so the crockery has some chance of getting clean.

So now I cook and I load the dishwasher. And unload it again and put all the dishes away.

What was that about labour saving devices?

The Art of Procrastination

Procrastination.

1.	the act of procrastinating; putting off or delaying or defering an action to a later time
2.	slowness as a consequence of not getting around to it

I have this down to a fine art.

Every month we have a Board meeting at work. As Secretary to the Board, it is my job to take notes and write the minutes of the meeting. In order to complete this job, I get to spend the following day working at home so that the distractions of the office do not disturb me. Ha! What about the distractions at home!?

I get up full of good intentions. This month I will settle down and crack the minutes out without getting distracted. But first, I must just walk The Lurchers. That done, I sit at my desk and start work.

Ahh...hold on, The Lurchers just need their breakfast. Whilst they're eating, I'll just make a cup of tea. As I fill the kettle I notice the tap is starting to get a build up of limescale and make a mental note to do something about that when I finish work.

Sit down and start typing again. The limescale on the tap suddenly starts to bother me. Get up and spray on the limescale remover. Go and sit down again. Remember that it shouldn't be left on too long. Get up and rinse it off. Now the sink looks grubby so I might as well just do that whilst I'm there.

Sit down again. Mmmmm...feeling hungry now so get up and get some cereal. It's difficult to type and eat cereal so this seems a good time to take a ten minute break and browse a few websites.

Tell myself that I must work for half an hour before I do anything else. Must just pop to the loo first though. Whilst in the bathroom, notice that the washing basket is overflowing so gather up an armful and head for the washing machine. Ah, there's already a load in the machine so take five minutes to hang that on the dryer. Oh. Washing already on the dryer so take that down and put it away in the bedroom. Ah, bed's not been made yet. Quickly shake out the duvets and plump up the pillows.

And so on it goes through out the day. Normally, limescale, washing baskets and unmade beds don't demand my immediate attention. It's amazing how much importance they take on when there is something less interesting that I really must be doing.

How good is your geography?

Mine, I can tell you, is absolutely useless!

A friend sent me this link and I'm not sure that I can quite forgive her. Traveller IQ Challenge. Apart from showing up my complete lack of geography knowledge (Himself was in hysterics watching my efforts last night) it is completely addictive! And I can still get no further than Level 6!

Why?

Why, at my age, am I still getting spots?

And why do I always get a big red corker of a spot two days before a big, posh party?

I mean...I exfoliate, I wash, I cleanse, I moisturise. So why does my skin think it's forty-something going on 15? I'd tell myself it's my youthful complexion acting youthful but that would be wishful thinking.

Pah!

REM Sleep Paralysis

Have you ever experienced REM sleep paralysis?

Well, actually, you all have as it's a natural part of your sleep pattern so I suppose a better question is have you ever been aware of experiencing it? This particular sleep paralysis occurs when you are in the REM stage of sleep: the brain literally awakens internally during REM sleep. In a person with normal sleep behavior the REM sleep stage is one of near paralysis for the entire body other than the muscles of the eye and the middle ear. In this stage of sleep, you experience your most vivid dreams. The dreams that you are most likely to remember. And if you wake up, or, at least, think you wake up, you can't move.

It's happened to me several times now and each time is as scary as the last.

I remember the first time very vividly. It was a Sunday morning and Himself was going out early. I decided to have a lie-in and fell back to sleep. Next thing I am aware of is what I thought was Himself coming back in the room and lying on top of me, almost crushing me. But the bizarre thing was the feeling of complete and utter evil. Then the dawning realisation that I was awake, but I couldn't move. I remember screaming and then I woke up. Properly woke up. And I was on my own. Himself wasn't there at all. The feeling of dread I was left with was awful because you really do think you are awake and that your dream is real.

It happened once when Himself was lying in bed next to me awake and reading. He was apparently chortling to himself at the noises I was making in my sleep. To him it was gurgling and muttering. To me, paralysed and terrified in my REM dream because someone was trying to kill me, I was screaming at him to wake me up. When I did eventually wake up, I left him in doubt that if I were to ever start muttering in my sleep again, he was to wake me up and not leave me there whilst chuckling to himself.

But the strangest of these dreams happened to me last night. Again I thought I had woken up but this time I started to feel like I was having some sort of fit. My neck and shoulders were twitching like crazy......twitching isn't quite the right word but it's the closest I can find to describe the feeling. On top of that, I could feel and hear something rapidly gnawing at the side of my neck. I imagined it was some sort of gremlin but I couldn't move and I couldn't stop it and the only thought that was going through my head was that I was going to die. Yet one side of my brain was obviously awake and being rational and it kept telling me that I knew this was one of "those" dreams and that I had to wake myself up. Fortunately, the fingers of my left hand were resting on my right arm and through sheer determination I made my fingers pinch my skin to wake myself up.

Damn scary.

Why do I do it?

Why do I buy myself new gadgets when I know I will never use them to their full potential and a cheaper, basic option would have done the job I need it to just as well? I'm sure it stems back to that time in life when you naively believe that "more expensive" must equal "better".

Take the other week. I spilt coffee all over my keyboard at work and, once it digested the coffee, it stopped working. So I head over to PC World's website and order myself a lovely shiny Microsoft Wireless Laser Keyboard 6000. Complete with a wireless Laser Mouse 6000.

It arrives and it's lovely. Except the ergonomically shaped keyboard seems to hinder my typing and I make far more spelling mistakes than usual. My fingers can't seem to move to the new key locations. Neither could I remove the "Reverse Slope Palm". So desperate did I become that I took my life in my hands and placed a call into Microsoft Support. It pains me to say that I was actually quite impressed with their help. Particularly as they didn't get totally exasperated with my seeming inability to understand American English and they resorted to sending me step by step photographs. Above and beyond I thought.

The keyboard has lots of buttons for you can store your favourite websites, access and use e-mail, Windows Live and order a large Latte with Double Espresso from your local Starbucks. And here I am two weeks later having reverted back to using Alt Tab and using the mouse and shortcuts on the screen, just like a I did before.

But as I thought I liked the keyboard so much I bought it's younger sister to use at home. I don't seem to have found the time to figure what all its buttons do, and I rather expect that I shall never quite get round to finding the time either. Neither do I like the mouse that came with that one so I have reverted to using my Wireless Trackball again. This leaves me with two wireless receivers that I know one day very soon are going to get into a fight with each other and leave me stranded keyboardless and mouseless.

Habit is an expensive habit.

Ugly Betty

I watched the pilot episode of Ugly Betty this evening. It has the makings of being something to veg out in front of on a Sunday afternoon (when they show the repeat).

If you haven't heard about it, or seen it, its basic premise is that the young girl (Ugly Betty), who isn't the prettiest thing on the block, gets her first job as Assistant to the Editorial Director of a high-ranking fashion magazine. She's hired by the ED's boss, who is also his father, in an attempt to stop him sleeping with any of the pretty young things that want the job. In a world where how you look is all, you can see the irony of the story line and it's a bit of a swipe at the vainess of the fashion industry by the programme makers when ugly girl prevails over the fashionistas.

But even more ironic to me is that it's blindingly obvious that the actress playing the part of Ugly Betty, isn't ugly at all. She's just made to look that way. Because in television, where how you look is also all, a less than pretty actress is never going to make it as an actress in the first place.

The old adage "people in glasshouses" springs to mind. But hey, we all like a good "underdog makes good" story don't we!?

Oh if I must.......

Nicked from Stu

1. Ever been given an engagement ring?
Twice although I never married

2. Longest friendship?
Bestestest friend Niki - at least 12 years

3. Last gift you received?
Apart from Christmas presents, probably my birthday last January...and I can't remember what it was!

4. How many times have you dropped your cell?
A few

5. When’s the last time you worked out?
At least 8 years ago

6. Thing you spend a lot of money on?
Rent

7. Last food you ate?
Roast chicken dinner with roast sweet potatoes, roast parsnips, spring greens and sprouts, lashings of gravy

8. First thing you notice about the opposite sex?
clothes

9. One favourite song?
Steelers Wheel - Stuck in the Middle with you

10. Where do you live?
Wimbledon

11. Cell phone service provider?
O2

12. Favourite mall store?
None. I hate shopping!

13. Longest job ever had?
4 years as a PA for DMGT

14. Do you own a pair of dice?
Lots, for playing a very similar game to the one Stu mentioned, Yahtzee and sundry ther games

15. Do you prank call people?
No.

16. Last wedding attended?
Ummm.....friends Steve and Trudi about 5 years ago

17. First friend you’d call if you won the lottery?
Niki

18. Last time you attended church?
Cousin's wedding about 6 years ago

19. How old are you?
41

20. Biggest lie you have heard?
It's in the post

21. What do you want to drive?
Something completely irresponsible and fast and low-slung!

22. Where’s your favourite place to eat with friends?
At home

23. Can you cook?
Yes. I love cooking, when I'm in the mood anyway. I make a mean Apple Pie!

24. What car do you drive?
Peugeot 406 Estate (W - 2000)

25. Best kisser?
Lordy.......pass on that one!

26. Last time you cried?
Monday

27. Most disliked food?
Liver

28. Thing you like most about yourself?
My feet and my overwhelming desire to help lost souls (believe it or not!)

29. Thing you dislike most about yourself?
My lack of confidence in myself and my tendency to fly off the handle at silly things.

30. Longest shift you have worked at a job?
12 hours when we have a Board meeting - although I do get a two hour break

31. Favourite movie?
Steel Magnolias

32. Can you sing?
Can't hold a tune in a bucket!

33. Last concert?
Probably Chris Rea. Years ago!

34. Last kiss?
This morning

35. What colour are your eyes?
Brown

36. Who knows your darkest secret?
Nobody except me.

37. Last movie rented?
No idea. Too long ago

38. Thing you never leave home without?
Keys, tobacco, mobile, The Lurchers and poo bags (seem to have them in every pocket!)

39. Favourite vacation spot?
North Cornwall

40. Do you like Chinese food?
Love it!

42. Is your room clean?
You're having a laugh aren't you!? No.

43. Laptop or desktop computer?
Desktop

44. Favourite comedian?
Pass

45. Do you smoke?
Yes

46. Sleep with or without clothes?
With

47. Who sleeps with you every night?
OH and The Lurchers

48. Long distance relationships work?
No

49. How many times have you been pulled over by the police?
Twice.

50. Pancakes or French toast?
Pancakes

51. Do you like coffee?
I go through phases. I usually drink herbal tea but am in a coffee phase at the moment

52. How do you like your eggs?
Scrambled with cheese

53. Do you believe in astrology?
Yes, if it's a personal chart. Not the crap in the newspapers


54. Last person you talked to on the phone?
OH

55. Last person on your missed call list?
Lisa

56. What was the last text message you received?
Someone asking me about a vet bill

57. McDonalds or Burger King?
Neither but Burger King if pushed.

58. Number of pillows?
4 when I'm sitting up reading. 2 for sleeping - one under my head one over my head.

59. What are you wearing right now?
Slobabout jersey trousers, t-shirt and sweatshirt. Sheepskin boot slippers

60. Pick a lyric, any lyric or song?
"In the Land of the Pigs, the Butcher is King" You've got to love Meat Loaf!


61. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?
Never had one.

62. Can you play pool?
Yes.

63. Do you know how to swim?
Yes.

64. Favourite ice cream?
Expensive vanilla or mint choc chip

65. Do you like maps?
Yes,, love'em!

66. Tell me a random fact about yourself?
I'm a Reiki Master (believe it or not...again!)

67. Do you do drugs?
Nothing illegal although I used to smoke pot. Although the combination of anaesthesia and morphine when I was in hospital was pretty damn good! Take Thyroxin every day to make up for the lack of a thyroid gland.

68. Ever attend a theme party?
Yes.

69. What is your favourite season?
Autumn. I love the colours.

70. Last time you laughed at something stupid?
Tuesday - staff party at a Chinese karaoke restaurant

71. What time did you wake up this morning?
5.30am ( I wanted to get to the supermarket for a few bits before the crowds.)

72. Best thing about winter?
Hoar frosts

73. Last time a cop gave you a ticket?
Got caught by a speed camera last May if that counts.

74. What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done?
Spent thenight ina haunted house and held a sceance

75. Name of your first pet?
Quella

76. Do you think pirates are cool or overrated?
Cool!

77. What are you doing this weekend?
A bit of shopping, bought tiles for the cottage. Fed the lads working at the cottage. Wrapping presents. Cooking.

78. Who’s your best friend?
Niki

79. What is the third letter of your name?
g

80. How old are your pets?
Lurcher No.1 - 6. Lurcher No.2 3. Lola (Hamster) about 18 months. Appollo Gemini Valentine (hamster) 22 months

81. What colour is your backpack?
green

82. Are you sick?
Bit of a cold hanging round

84. Is the bathroom open?
yes

87. Are you smiling?
Not at the moment no.

88. Do you have on eye-liner?
No.

89. Do you miss someone right now?
Niki and my Grandpa who died 18 months ago.

90. If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?
Cornwall

91. Do you have a Myspace?
No

92. Are you in high school?
No.

93. Do you have a crush?
No

94. What is your favourite nickname for yourself?
Silly cow

95. What colour is your bathing suit?
Black

96. What’s your favourite brand of water?
The cheap stuff from Asda but Pellegrino if I'm really splashing out.

97. Did you go on vacation last month?
No

98. Have you ever been on a cruise?
No.

99. Do you have a sister?
No.

100. Are you upstairs?
No - live in a flat.

Nac Mac Feegle

From up near the roofs came the sounds of a conversation.

'Aye, but pigs are no' that interestin.'

'Oh, I dinnae ken aboot that. A verrae useful animal is the pig. You can eat every part o' it, ye ken, except for the squeal'

'Ach, ye're wrong there. Ye can use the squeal'

'Dinnae be daft'

'Aye, ye can so! Ye make up a pie crust, right, an' ye put in a lot o' ham, right, an' then ye catch the squeal, put the top on the pie before he can escape, right, an' bung it straight in the oven'

'I ne'er heard such a thing as that!'

'Have ye no? It's called squeal and ham pie'

*chortles with laughter*....and that's why I love reading Pratchett!

I really wish.....

I really wish that I had some exciting news to impart to you, but I don't.

The parents came up for the weekend.
It rained. A lot.
Lurcher No.2 has a poorly paw again.
I'm still not sleeping well and am very tired. OH's snoring doesn't help so if anyone has any remedies I'd be pleased to hear them!

And that's it! It might be quiet and boring but every now and again, quiet and boring is GOOD!

Think Fast!

Nicked from Stu!

Think Fast Survey- answer with the first thing that pops into your head DONT CHEAT!!!

1. My ex is still…
....drunk probably.

2. I am listening to…
...the sound of a mini-digger as it demolishes the old stable block next my office.

3. Maybe I should…
....do some work rather than be doing this!

4. I love…
...my Lurchers!

5. My bestfriend(s)….
....is poorly and I can't do anything to help.

6. I dont understand…
.......the minds of some people.

7. I lost respect for…
......my father when he decided his "bit on the side" was more important than his daughter.

9. The meaning of my screen name is…
.....my initials: Angela Oakley Jayne

10. Love is…
....overrated!

11. Somewhere, someone is…
...living my alternative reality.

12. I will always…
.......be me.

13. Forever seems…
.......too close for comfort with so much to cram in!

14. I never ever want to lose…
......sight of the good things.

15. My mobile phone is…
...errrrmmm around somewhere, just not sure where!

16. When I woke up this morning…
...I hit the snooze button and had a cuddle with Lurcher No.2.

17. I get annoyed at…
....incompetent people.

18. Parties are..
...really not my thing.

19. My pets…
...are my life.

20. Kisses are…..
......important.

Zzzzzzz........

On Monday night, I got to sleep just fine. Then I woke up at 3am and couldn't get back to sleep so got up at 4am and started working on the Board minutes.

Last night I couldn't get to sleep and it was 3am before I finally dropped off.

As I'm an 8 hours of sleep a night kind of girl, 8 hours sleep in the last 48 hours might just mean that today gets a bit fraught.

A Girl Night In

OH has gone out with the boys so I cooked myself my favourite dinner (which OH hates) and watched my favourite film.....I defy anyone to watch Steel Magnolias and not ball their eyes out.

Only one thing wrong....I forgot to get in the chocolate *slaps self for being so remiss*